Go Here, Read This. Please

So, I know it's late in the day.  But I've been dealing with a feverish toddler.  Go here, and read this.  It's my newest post at Our Mommyhood.





And after today, I can't imagine having another anytime soon.

Cloth Diapering 101 - Prepping

It was pointed out to me that there is a hole in my Cloth Diapering 101 information - namely on preparing cloth diapers for first use.  I did actually mention it before, specifially for prefolds, but it's worth discussing again.

Prepping, or preparing, cloth diapers for first use depends mainly on the fabric.  The CD 101 post on material and fabrics mentions this (one sentence in the middle of a long post.  Hey, I said "mentions".)  Most diapers will only need one wash in order to be "prepped".  Pocket diapers with fleece inners, microfiber inserts, covers, cotton fitteds, all will be fine with a single wash - unless the manufacturer recommends otherwise.

If the diaper is made of bamboo, hemp, or other natural fiber, you will need to wash (with detergent) and dry the item several times to strip out the natural oils.  The actual precise number of washes varies - every time I buy hemp or bamboo prefolds I am given different instructions by the maker.  I generally wash three times before first use, knowing full absorbancy will come after about wash 8.  In those trial wearings, we are usually at home on a weekend (so a leak can quickly be changed and isn't dire), and I change her frequently so the diaper doesn't get too soaked.  With this method, I'm not just washing and washing without using the diapers, but I realize they won't be fully absorbent until after a few of these short trial wearings.

Because of the oils in bamboo and hemp, when doing the first few preparation washes, wash these diapers separately from your other diapers.  That way the oils don't coat your other diapers and lessen their absorbency.  When I'm prepping diapers, unless I have a huge load, I will often throw them in with towels for the first few washes.  It feels less tedious that way, and they are getting detergent and dryer time, which is important in the prepping process.  Also, it doesn't feel like it's "holding up" the laundry cycle for "real" laundry that way either.

Wow, she was leeeeeetle!  around 9 months when this photo was taken

Prefolds arrive at your door brand spanking new.  Looking like a crisply pressed white shirt, you may not recognize them as actual prefolds, or think that they will function as absorbent diapers.  They will - they just have to be prepped.  Again, the actual number of times varies.  I also wash/dry these around three times to get them moderately fluffy, and then start the trial wearings.  Bleached cotton prefolds will probably be ready for wear in four washes.  Organic cotton prefolds may have more of the natural oils left in them, and may need one or two more washes to fluff up well.



Brand spanking new on left, after one wash in middle, after two washes on right.  See how much fluffier - and therefore smaller - they get.  After this there wasn't much change in fluff or size.



As diapers get "prepped" - particularly with prefolds, but also pocket inserts - they outer size dimensions will become smaller.  As the fabric shrinks up, the layers get fluffier (and feel thicker) so the overall diaper is smaller when fully prepped.  Not enough to make a huge difference with fitteds, but you'll notice it with prefolds.

If you ever have any questions about the preparation of a specific diaper, you can always check the manufacturer's website.  They will often have information about washing, and that usually includes some kind of statement on prepping.  If not, go by the fabric.  If you're still in doubt, ask around.  Cloth diaper mamas LOVE to give advice!

If You're A SMC, Don't Buy This Book

My Mom bought this book at the Christian Bookstore when the Wee One was little.  It's a sweet little book, full of some mommy-isms.  It is written by a man, but he has to make money some way too, right?

I was even a little heartwarmed that there was a whole section for Single Mamas.

Until I read this:

It says: "Being a single mom means knowing that, while two-parent homes are best for children, life doesn't always work out that way."

I'm sorry, I vehemently disagree.  Two-parent homes are NOT best for children.

Read this, and tell me that having a father was better for that child than being in my household.  Read this and tell me that a two-parent household is better for that child than having a single mother like me, or like all the other SMC's whose blogs I read.

Seriously?

And given the obviously conservative views of the author, does he really think that two lesbian parents are better than my situation, or two gay daddies are better than one single mommie?  (I read somehwhere there is research that shows that children of two lesbian mommies score better on tests and have some other positives.  I should find it to link.  Too busy.  Also, I've said before that perhaps I should try the two mommies thing.  Not right now, though.)  Back to the point - would this conservative think that two women or two men would be better households than mine?  I don't think he would.  But there he writes, "knowing two parent homes are best for children".  No, I'm sorry, I don't know that.  In fact, I believe the opposite.  I believe that two people in a home who have emotional issues, animosity and anger, or substance abuse issues can be more detrimental to a child than a parent who loves and provides and cares for them, and surrounds their child with an extended support system.

And I won't even go into the fact that the very next paragraph is about a "new relationship".  Because that's FIRST on the mind of every single mama, isn't it?  OMG, I have to be in another relationship right now.  Because THAT'S just the BEST thing for my little one and me, isn't it?  GOD FORBID it just be the two of us in a healthy and happy home environment.

It's Going Around Like An STD

I was nominated for the Versatile Blogger award by not one but TWO of the bloggers I follow.  Hopeful started it, and then Jellybean Mama accused me of being a stalker nominated me too.  (I prefer the term "fan" to "stalker".  It sounds less ... stalker-ish, really.)

Here are the rules to the Versatile Blogger Award:

• Thank and link back to the person nice enough to give you the award
• Share seven things about yourself
• Pass the award along to seven other bloggers who you think are fabulous
• Contact the bloggers you chose and let them know about the award

Seven things ...

Hmm.  Seven interesting things?  Or just seven things?

See, I'm pretty "out there", so it's hard to think of stuff that isn't already on the blog.  And if it ain't on the blog, that probably means I'm not talking about it.

Ok, how about seven things about my Wee One!

No, it has to be about me????

1.  I sometimes get writer's block when the pressure is on.  Hence the above dialogue.  Most of the time, it just flows out, and I have no idea where it comes from.

2.  I had a dream about my Wee One before she came.  She was afraid to come, but I told her I would take care of her.

3.  I'm broke after my kitchen re-do, my bathroom re-do, and getting the kid decent fall/winter daycare clothes.  It worries me to be broke.  It's not just me now, but me-and-her.  I have to start behaving like a grownup.

4.  I don't feel like a grownup.  Sometimes I feel like I'm 19 inside.  Okay, maybe 27.  But not 30-whatever-the-hell-I'm-going-to-be-in-January.  My dad thought I was going to be 40.  PAY ATTENTION DAD, that's three years from now.

5.  My favorite color is blue.  Periwinkle in the summer, Navy in the winter. 

6.  There are people who aren't in my life anymore that I miss.  People from graduate school.  People from where I used to live.  I'm not good at keeping up with people. 

7.  I hate Halloween.  See the earlier post for more details.

Now I have to nominate seven other bloggers.  This is the annoying part.  Why can't it be like one or two, like other "awards"?  Ok, here goes.

Here are seven blogs that I really think you should check out.
1.  Lesbian Dad.  She's a pretty big blogger, so she might not do the "blog award" thing.  She has amazing thoughts on gender identity, gay parenting, family diversity, and parenting/families in general.  Even if she doesn't do the award thing, I'd like to take the opportunity to encourage you to read some of her stuff.
2.  Funky Mama Bird.  She's my editor at Our Mommyhood, so I have to kiss up to her appreciate her every now and then.  She has an adorable little boy that always seems to be in the same toddler phase as my Wee One, so the mommies end up totally relating.  That's why I started blogging.
3.  Serifm.  Maybe if I send her this award, she'll write more on her blog, because I love reading her stuff.  But then again, she is like 12 months pregnant, so she has a few more important things on her plate.
4.  Candace. Has a really cute little boy, so go see him.
5.  FruitFish.  A mama in the making, and doing the dating thing again - more nerve than I have at the moment
6.  Esperanza.  It's amazing who you meet through IComLeavWe
7. Baby Time Bomb.  Has a known donor, so I like following her story.

Change in Latitude, Change in Attitude. Sort of.

Go here and look at this costume.  Go ahead, I'll wait.  I know, it's an external link.  I couldn't save the photo right.  Go on.  Please?

It's on its way and should be here on Friday.

And my mother won't stop teasing me about it.  She thinks it looks like a rat.  Her favorite thing now is to ask people if they want to dress up like the mama otter to take her Trick or Treating (since she knows all about my Halloween aversion.)

She wants to put a big pink bow in The Wee One's hair so people will know she's a girl.

It's an Animal Planet Collector's Edition Sea Otter costume.

Okay, now you're all laughing at me.  You're all thinking it looks like a rat.

Folks, this is how a NERD does Halloween when they'd rather be drunk watching football. 

But you know what?  I'm TOTALLY doing Halloween this year.  WHOLE NINE YARDS (hey, did you know that's a football term?).

On Monday night we're going ToT (Trick or Treating, see TOTALLY INTO IT) at an event thrown by the local Downtown Association.  Thursday will be the Zoo (they're closed on actual Halloween and Thursday might be a slightly-less-busy night).  Friday afternoon is ToT with her daycare to a local business.  Sunday will be actual ToT in the neighborhood (before bed for Monday morning daycare CAN I CLAW MY EYES OUT NOW ...)

Just you wait.  More photos of a pint-sized rat sea otter than you've ever seen before, guaranteed.  And one HALLOWEEN MOMMIE.

I'm trying, I really am.  The first zombie-covered-in-blood I may puke, but I'm trying.

A Rave for Twinkletoes Diapers

I've bought lots of homemade diapers (usually referred to as WAHM diapers - made by a Work At Home Mom).  I've bought some that I've loved and re-purchased from those mamas, and then I bought a few that were pretty crappy.  So I got off the WAHM bandwagon for a while, and only bought more commercial brands of diapers.

My most recent purchase included the Flip and Econobum systems, which I recently reviewed for you guys.  (Um, like, in the previous post.)  I love the Flip cover (basically because of its snap closure), but I didn't love the insert, as I mentioned.

Meanwhile, I had previously purchased some narrow, thin bamboo/zorb inserts from a WAHM in Canada who seems to be out of business now.  I only have three inserts, and I use them to supplement my nighttime system.  So if I go more than three days between diaper washes (which I often do, but I don't recommend it because of The Stinkies), then I don't have enough of the nighttime inserts.

A search on Etsy led me to Vanessa at Twinkletoes Diapers.  I loved her selection, and bought several different things to try.

And I love all of them.

These are contoured bamboo zorb inserts.  They are nice and soft on both sides, and I have used them both stuffed in a pocket diaper as well as just laid into a cover.

These are my favorite!  These are suedecloth-topped bamboo/zorb inserts that I use in the Flip cover.  Nice and soft stay-dry top, nice and absorbent.

Laying in the Flip cover

Under-the-skirt action shot

 And this is the topper, the overnight bamboo/zorb insert.  This thing is hefty - not really in size, since it's really not that thick, but man does it absorb!  I haven't had the nerve yet to use it alone in the nighttime diaper, so I still use it with the Thirsties insert, but I've used it alone in a pocket during the day and it is very absorbent.

They are all very well-made products, and I highly recommend you check out her selection of inserts in her Etsy shop.

CD 101 - New (to me) Diapers

I started cloth diapering in April 2009.  Okay, so we did sposies for the first 6 or 8 weeks, so it was more like end-of-May-2009.  So who's counting?

I had seriously researched cloth diapers while I was preggo.  I mean, there's nothing better when you're pregnant than sitting on the couch stuffing your face and surfing the internet reading about baby stuff.  And fun baby stuff, not stuff about how horrible labor and delivery are, and all the things that go wrong with a newborn, or how you'll never sleep again until she's 22, and all that holy hell.

Some time after I had settled on a cloth diapering system that worked for us, Cotton Babies, the makers of the BumGenius brand of cloth diapers, came out with two new diapering "systems".  I pretty much stayed away from the whole conversation, for a couple of reasons.  (1) I had tried the Gro Baby system because people were so excited about a new type of diaper coming out, and I hated it.  I didn't want to get caught up in the hype of a new diapering "system".  (2) I knew what I was doing was working, and I didn't want to be tempted to try something else that might not work as well.  (3) I had a whole lot of diapers already and didn't need to spend the money on more.

But when I started getting titles like "Queen of Cloth Diapering" and "Cloth Diaper Czar", and also had some paypal that I needed to spend, I thought of you, my dear readers.  How could I, in good conscience, have those titles if there were cloth diapers out there that I haven't tried? 

So I bought the Flip and the Econobum systems to try out.

The Econobum system is just a prefold and cover system.  I knew that going in.  I have enough prefolds to diaper a small army of differently-sized children (except I gave some as a baby shower gift this weekend, so if a small army of diaper-needing children show up at my house, I have to call someone for backup.)  But the cover closes with snaps, and I am in need of snapping covers, since I have a child that strips naked at any opportunity to take off a velcro cover.  So I bought a single cover/prefold package.

The prefold is a little different than standard prefolds.  It doesn't have the extra thickness in the middle.  And instead of being three long panels, the stitching divides the prefold into six sections.  The prefold is still a rectangle, longer in one direction.  The instructions say that you can tri fold one way for smaller babies/covers (with the shorter length as the long length of the diaper), and then use the longer length as your baby grows.  The prefold is unbleached cotton, which I prefer for prefolds anyway.

Econobum prefold on left, Flip organic insert on right

The system holds up to its name.  Prefolds and covers are the most economical approach to cloth diapering anyway, and this system packages differing numbers of prefolds with covers so you can buy exactly what you need.  At 9.99 for a prefold and cover, that's a good deal.  The site recently had seconds of a prefold and cover package for 5.99.  That's an amazing price for cloth diapers.

While the cover works fine, it is definitely a cheap cover, compared to others I am using.  There is only a single row of snaps, which sometimes makes the fit a little strange.  The PUL is very thin, and I'm really afraid of the snaps holding up well.  I would hate for the snaps to tear through the thin PUL.  But at this price, it will be affordable to replace the cover if anything happens.

Covers come only in white, which is a drawback to me personally, but it's not a reason to not use the system.   Especially as affordable as it is.

I had a hard time choosing a color for the Flip cover.  Again, I wanted to buy the minimum to try - I was just doing this as an experiment for you people anyway.  I bought the Bubble colored cover with the organic insert, then I bought a standard insert to see how it differed.  I adore the color of the cover, it's a light grayish-purple color.  It's basically my go-to cover now.

The Flip cover is a snap-closure PUL cover with flaps in the front and back, which I think are pretty freaking useless.  They're there to hold the inserts in place, which they don't really do a good job of doing, and you don't need to hold inserts in place in the first place if the cover fits properly.  I've been using it as a cover to prefolds for a couple of weeks now, and I never use the flaps.  But they're there, and others may have a different opinion about their usefulness.

Standard (stay-dry) insert on left, organic insert on right

The organic insert is basically an organic prefold diaper.  You fold it in thirds to put it in the cover.  So if you're using the organic "inserts", the Flip system is basically a cover and prefold system anyway.

The standard insert is too freaking long.  If I had a bigger, older, taller kid and was on the full rise setting, I might feel differently.  Come back and see me in two years and ... she'll be potty trained well before then.  The idea is that you're supposed to fold over the extra length, but it creates quite a bit of bulk that way. (Please remember that microfiber cannot go next to the skin, it is too irritating.)  I bought some bamboo/zorb inserts from a mama on Etsy that I absolutely adore - I'm doing a rave next on those, so come back to see photos of those inserts in the Flip cover.  If I was doing the Flip as our regular system, I would either do the organic inserts or homemade ones that aren't as long.

I love that the cover has two rows of snaps, that helps the closure feel secure and fit correctly.  And I adore the colors that it comes in, even the darker ones.

Here's my honest takeaway on both systems:  if you're really strapped for cash and need the absolute cheapest diapers available, and want brand new, never used diapers, the Econobum system will help meet your needs.

I still prefer Thirsties covers for the leg gussets, though.  You can get used covers for what you're paying for the Econobum covers, and the Thirsties are better quality. 

If you like the idea of the insert-and-cover system in the Flip, you can still do that by just laying your insert in the cover.  You don't need half-an-inch of fabric to NOT hold it in place.  So if you like the Flip inserts, buy a bunch, and use them in a regular cover.  If not, find a favorite homemade insert (see next post for some good ideas).

I'm glad I tried them.  I have two snap-closure covers now, and that has helped my stripping-naked toddler keep her diaper on under dresses.  I really like the two-row closure on the Flip, as well as the color, and I use that cover all the time now.  But neither system seemed that revolutionary to me, and neither are that different than a regular prefold-and-cover that we use on the weekends anyway. 

Yes, she is sitting on her potty chair in the middle of the living room with her diaper on.  I was doing something other than cleaning, obviously.

And there you are, dear readers, the next installment in the Cloth Diapering Queen/Czar/Master of the Universe's Cloth Diapering 101 series.  The things I do for you ladies!