Sunday, January 16, 2011

The F Word

WARNING: This post contains profanity.  Not suitable for the young 'ens.  Except my young 'en is the one speaking ....

So yesterday my mom, my kid, my godmother, and I, took a road trip.  1.5 hour drive to an outlet mall, hours of shopping and eating, then the drive home.  It was fun.  Until the kid started screaming.  Then, not so fun anymore.

We parked the car when we got there, and I got the kid out and set her down.

She said "fuck".

Wha...?

We walk into a cooking store.  "Fuck".   A friendly gentleman gives me a knowing look.  I make a mental note not to say anything profane ever again ever-ever-ever-in-my-life-not-even-after-she's-21-and-moved-out-please-God-don't-let-my-mom-hear-her-say-fuck-in-the-store.

The child starts running in the direction of a display, and repeats "fuck, fuck, fuck".  I am dying.  Where is my mother?  Please don't stare, judgemental strangers.



She walks up to a display of kid's aprons.  She points, and says "fuck".

Pointing?  To a frog. 

Frog. 

Not "fuck", "frog".



Her version of "duck" and "dog" sound nothing alike, so why her version of "frog" sounds like "fuck", I have no idea.

But if you hear my kid say "fuck", look around for a frog.

8 comments:

hopefulcc said...

LOVE this story! And how great you have it on video - definitely something to show to all future boyfriends :)

Esperanza said...

Oh my god. Amazing. I love it. So glad you're getting it on film for posterity too.

Funky Mama Bird said...

That is hilarious. I've heard some kids say "fuck" for "truck" and for "fork". Luckily for me Gunne says "Druck" and "for". Now anyway. I'm sure that now that I've typed this he will wake up from his nap and drop an F-bomb on me the second I go in his room.

My Plus 1 said...

O-M-G... hilarious! Soooo funny!!!!!!

FruitFish said...

FUNNY!!!! And here I thought frogs were beep-beeps. That's how my niece said it (trying to imitate the ribbit sound.)
Though I'm sure you'll still try to watch what you say around her ;)

Laraf123 said...

That what my son called his fork for several months! Too funny!

MommieV said...

Conversation in the car today:

Her: fuck
Me: frog
Her: fuck
Me: frog
etc ....
Me: fr-o-g (drawing out and emphasizing the g)
Her: FU-CK (drawing out and emphasizing the "k" sound in a much louder way)

Me: I give up.

Mrs. Call Me Crazy said...

OMG. OMG. OMG. I LOVE HER!

She is like a little Meredith, except I don't think I am saying frog.

Also, my husband used to call home when he was out with his friends to make my son say dump truck over the phone while he had him on speaker.

"Dumb Fuck."