(This is related to my post yesterday about the difficulty of single mothers finding appropriate "fill-in" baby books. But I thought it a different enough topic that I wrote it separately.)
One of the things I am struggling with as a single mom is ... what to do about all the Daddy "stuff" in the world? We go to Music Together classes and sing songs where verses about mommies alternate with verses about daddies. We go to sign language class and learn the sign for mommy and the sign for daddy. We read a bedtime book that has mommy giving a bath and daddy reading a book.
There just doesn't seem to be much of a model in everyday life of a family that looks like ours. At least not in the books we are reading, the stories we are reading, or the pictures we are seeing.
So I'm searching for bedtime books that have mommy giving a bath and then mommy reading the books, because that's what we do.
I'm prepared for the questions. I have practiced "Every family is different, sweetie. Some families have a mommy and a daddy, but some families just have a daddy, or just have a mommie. Some families have two mommies and some have two daddies. Our family is a mommie and a Nan and a Grandpa. And we love you very very much." And I think I can almost pull it off.
But to be able to read books to her where it doesn't seem strange or out-of-the-ordinary to just have a mommy would be nice. To be able to read books where you don't cringe at the inevitable daddy part would be a welcome addition.
Unfortunately, I'm not finding much. It's hard to search Amazon, because it seems to be such a non-issue to them that they don't even categorize the books on whether or not there is a daddy character. I've come across some blog posts here and here which are a great start. Any other suggestions would be welcome.
I guess I just want a book that says "yes, it's just me and you kid. But that's OK."
A related, but separate topic is how to discuss with your children how they actually came to be. I did it the old fashioned way, so I don't have to practice saying "donor sperm" to my daughter (thank GOD!). This site was recommended to me for books about IVF, donor egg, donor sperm, and lots more. They have single dad books too.
So if you know of any good books on any topic, including bedtime, that have a single parent character, please send them my way. Thanks!