Sunday, August 15, 2010

I Was Feeling Self-Satisfied, Until ...

So, I think the Universe sits in an armchair and reads what I write on the internet.  Sometimes She decides to be nice to me and bestow upon me what I have written a wish for.  Other times, She decides that it's much more sport to play with me.

I was very proud of myself.  I somehow managed to take a night-nursing, co-sleeping 14-month-old and night wean her, teach her to sleep in her own bed, teach her to sleep through the night, and generally turn her into a crib-sleeping-through-the-night 16-month-old.

And then I went back to work.

She is back in my bed.

Last night she nursed at 11:00 pm, 1:00 am, 3:00 am, and ....

We've slid all the way down the slippery slope and landed with a thud at the bottom.

The Universe is on her throne, giggling.  I think it's all because I was so very proud of myself that I made a tab for the blog, labeled it "sleeping", linked to all my posts on sleep training, and put it all out there as if it could be a great example for other mamas who were having the same issues.

Really, what it should say?

Quit your job, stay home with your kid all day every day, and then they will be so sick of seeing your face by 8:00 p.m. they will gladly sleep in their own bed all night long so they don't have to hear your sing-song voice for a few hours.  Don't you dare decide that, as a single mother, you do need to work to pay the mortgage and the expensive daycare and all the other things you need for a comfortable life, and go back to work, because your child WILL NEVER SLEEP AGAIN.

Because that is apparently what is happening to us.

We're down to 45-minute naps after time spent crying and screaming that I have abandoned her in her crib.  We are down to sleeping in 3-hour stretches and then wanting into mommies bed - and mommies nursing bra - in order for anyone in the house to get back to sleep at night.

All because of the arrival of August, and fall semester, and back-to-work for Mommie.

My apologies for being smug and self-satisfied.  Please, Universe, I have learned the lesson of humility.


Candace said...

I feel the same way! I just wrote a post about sleeping... I am trying to get him in his own room and last night was the worst night we have had thus far!! This whole mom thing is so complicated

Genkicat said...

Ugh! Don't tell me this. I have to go back to work in about 21/2 months (Yikes!) and right now I have a pretty good sleeper (knocking on wood so as not to piss off the universe).

Funky Mama Bird said...

I once angered the Gods of Sleep. I have learned my lesson and I never, ever give parenting advice on my blog now. Ever. Because the Universe? Has a mighty twisted sense of humor.

Serifm said...

Now I'm picturing the Universe as Lily Tomlin in her big chair, blowing raspberries at you.

But seriously. I've read Dr. Sears Baby Book cover to cover, and that was my problem as well. What if I work outside the home? Then what? Am I doomed to a non-bonded, non-sleeping baby?

There must be a solution. You need to find it, and post under your Sleeping tab. ;-)

MommieV said...

Sara, "Nursing Mother, Working Mother" addresses the going-back-to-work-and-still-being-an-attachment-parent thing. (I so wish I had put that in quotes instead of hyphenating but oh well.)

That's how Cait and I ended up cosleeping and nursing. It does allow you to stay bonded through the transition, and then later, when they're a little older, you can work on the transition to their room/bed/cot-on-the-floor/whatever.

The good news is, after the Friday night and Saturday night in my bed, she slept in her bed all night Sunday and Monday nights. So we're managing.

Maybe Lily read this last post too and feels sorry for me.